Honour your father and your mother!
By: Pastor Taiwo Odubiyi E-mail: info@pastortaiwoodubiyi.org.uk
You may be wondering, “What does it mean to honour them?” It simply means to give them great respect or regard, to esteem them highly, revere or treasure them. It also means that children should not disrespect or scorn their parents.
In Ephesians 6: 2,3, the Bible says, “Honour your father and mother—which is the first commandment with a promise— so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” We know by now that God’s promises are not empty ones for His words are ‘Yes’ and ‘Amen’ in Jesus. Honouring parents is not an advice or something children can do when they feel like it but a commandment, and it is important to the extent that it was one of the Ten Commandments that God gave the children of Israel as written in Exodus 20. Moses reminded the children of Israel about this commandment in Deuteronomy 5:16 , and in Colossians 3:20 , the Bible says, “Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing to the Lord.”
God wants us to honour our parents whether they are rich or poor, literate or illiterate. In one of my novels ‘You Found Me’ Sam told Ann, “You’ve seen photographs of my family. You know I come from a very humble background.” He shrugged. “If I had a say in the matter when I was being born, I would probably choose rich parents but I didn’t have a say, I wasn’t consulted.” Smiling, he added, “I don’t have regrets though. I have wonderful parents and I love them very much.”
I need to point out here that there cannot be true honour without love, and there cannot be love if the child doesn’t know why he or she should honour the parents.
Why should we honour our parents?
1. According to the above quoted scriptures, it is so that we may live long and that it may be well with us.
2. By honouring them, we are also sowing seeds of favour for our future, that our children may honour and take care of us. Life is about sowing and reaping, and honour brings honour. As I have preached several times, the truth is that a time will come when the children will become parents, when the care giver will become the care taker, and parents will depend on their children. In John 21:18, Jesus told Peter, “Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish.”
3. We should also honour them because God says so.
4. We should also honour them because they are our parents and deserve it. Parents love, take care and provide the most for their children.
Parents are a blessing to their children but sometimes, it turns out that the children don’t do so much or even appreciate or give respect to their parents. Some children obviously have no regard for their parents. When I was growing up, there was this young man in the neighbourhood who regularly hit his mother, to everyone’s horror! One particular morning, I saw him come out of his house, shouting and telling some neighbours who stood by, “Warn her! If she as much as touches me, I will beat her up!”
I wondered who he was referring to but soon knew, as his mother rushed outside and lunged at him, cursing him. True to his word, he carried his mother up and threw her on the ground! I was shocked! I – had – never – seen – such a thing before in my life! Such a thing is very wrong and should never happen.
Honouring our parents on Mother’s and Father’s Day is very good but not enough. We should honour them everyday.
How do we honour them?
1. By obeying them. Young children especially should obey their parents and do what they are asked to do. In the Bible, the children of Jonadab obeyed the commandment of their father. For that reason, God told them in Jeremiah 35:18-19, “Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel: ‘Because you have obeyed the commandment of Jonadab your father, and kept all his precepts and done according to all that he commanded you, therefore thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel: “Jonadab the son of Rechab shall not lack a man to stand before Me forever.”’”
2. By helping them around the house and doing things for them especially things which they can no longer do for themselves, such as cleaning the house, doing the laundry.
3. By respecting them in our words, body language and attitude. If for any reason you don’t share your parents’ opinion or like what they are saying, you should still show respect in your words and the way you talk to them.
4. By giving them gifts regularly and supporting them financially.
5. By visiting or getting in touch with them on phone regularly.
6. By taking care of them and showing them love.
7. By praying for them.
8. By appreciating them publicly. In ‘Love On The Pulpit’ when Dave’s parents were celebrating their wedding anniversary, he came out to say how much he appreciated them. Then he added, “I rejoice with you today, and it’s an opportunity for me to tell you how much you’re appreciated. On behalf of myself and my younger ones, I want to say that we love you.” He left where he was and walked over to his parents to embrace them. His brothers and sisters came out as well and embraced their parents in turn.
9. By remembering their birthdays and special occasions.
My father used to tell us his children not to bother giving him and my mom gifts or monthly allowance. His reasons were: they had enough money to live by; he wouldn’t want any child to say he or she was providing for them; we (the children) had our own families to take care of. But my mother corrected him by saying, “It doesn’t matter that we have our own money. We should take whatever our children give us. It is biblical and right for children to honour their parents and do things for them so that God can bless them. Whenever they bring a gift, we should take it and pray for them.” She was right.
Even if your parents are very wealthy, you still need to do things for them and give them gifts. It is good and well pleasing to God.
Ma, d Lord wil continue 2 bless u 4 dis 1daful lecture. I hav decided not 2 4giv or 2 hav anytin doin wit my father jst d way he did 2 me durin n afta my wedin. Even dis mournin b4 checkin my mail, we hav qurel n i decide nt goin 2 him again. but readin ur lecture book on honour ur parent, i hav decided 2 be prayin 4 him. i cn’t state most of wat he did 2 me hear.
Ma, d Lord presence wil neva depart frm u n daddy ur luvly husband.
I always read most of ur novels.
stay blessed ma.